Monday, September 01, 2014


Honolulu City Council proposal would outlaw breathing in public

by Larry Geller

At a hearing last Thursday, the Honolulu City Council proposed a number of bills, one of which would criminalize breathing in public in Waikiki.

Breathing will be allowed in a designated breathing area to be set up on remote Sand Island. The island is separated from mainland Oahu by a drawbridge that can be raised, if necessary, should civil disturbance ensue among the exiles.

City Managing Director  Ember Shinn would not give a completion date for the Sand Island concentration camp. An advocate in the audience was heard to mumble, “Don’t hold your breath.”

When asked whether criminalizing breathing, which after all is a basic bodily function, would fit into Mayor Kirk Caldwell’s program of “compassionate disruption,” a spokesperson for the Mayor replied that of course it would. As to the cost of enforcement, she stated that “In fact, it’s a very modest proposal.”


Love it.
Larry are you trying to see if we are paying attention? If so, you succeeded. LOL.

But how would they tax that?

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